The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines fidelity as both “the quality or state of being faithful,” along with being “[accurate and exact] in details.” When it comes to fidelity in marriage, the details really do matter.
Through small and simple things, you can show your spouse that you are completely committed to them, and to your marriage.
1. Loyal spouses are respectful of each other – in private and in person
Loyal spouses listen carefully and attentively to each other. And they always speak highly of each other – especially when their husband or wife isn’t around. You know the all-too easy temptation to poke fun at something silly your wife did when you are golfing with your buddies – don’t do it. And ladies, don’t husband-bash in the break-room at work. You know better.
2. Loyal spouses use the internet and social media in positive and uplifting ways
They keep their interactions with members of the opposite sex appropriate and distanced. They keep their eyes, hands, and hearts to themselves. They avoid tempting situations like Facebook chatting with a friend of the opposite sex or texting their cute coworker just because. They focus instead on using the internet and social media in positive ways. They avoid pornography and other inappropriate images, chatrooms, and websites that would cause them to be unfaithful to their spouse in their heart or mind.
3. Loyal spouses stand up for each other
Loyal spouses stand up for each other in all situations. Is someone poking fun of your wife or making a cutting remark over dinner? Don’t laugh, politely ask them to knock it off and then share something you love about your wife.
4. Loyal spouses keep private things private
Loyal spouses keep certain things just between the two of them. Ladies, this means that you need to keep your distance with your mom (don’t push her away, just keep a healthy distance). Mom is no longer your go-to person. Your husband is. Loyal spouses are also careful to not turn to co-workers, friends, or online connections to discuss private issues between you and your spouse. (At times it may be necessary to confide in a professional counselor or ecclesiastical leader, and that is perfectly acceptable.)
5. Loyal spouses make decisions, together as husband and wife (regardless of what their parents, neighbors, friends, and co-workers think)
They don’t do things because his mom told them that’s the way to do it. They talk through issues and important decisions together and decide what is best for their individual family. They also don’t make important decisions on their own, without consulting each other. Which leads us to #7…
6. Loyal spouses are an open book with each other
7. Loyal spouses turn to each other first
8. Loyal spouses prioritize their spouse above all else
Loyal spouses give their time, energy, and talents to serving their spouse. They put each other first – above work, above hobbies, above crafting, above golfing, above cleaning the house, above friends, above extended family, above babies. Loyal spouses don’t let children take priority over their spouse. That certainly doesn’t mean they don’t give needed and, at times, undivided attention to their children. It simply means they remember at all times that the greatest source of comfort and security a child can have is to know their parents love each other.